boxes and roots

and so i've moved again. in the past year (really 9 months), i have moved my crap around more times than i have in the previous 18 years of my life. moving is a strange thing to me, maybe because it is always when i am finally feeling settled in somewhere that i move again, but something in me resists pulling out those boxes.

this term at linfield, i only ever halfway unpacked. i don't know if that is because in the back of my mind i knew i would be re-packing in just a few months, or if it was an acknowledgment in myself that my life is transient right now. things i used every day escaped their cardboard confinements, but things i pull out more occasionally--craft supplies, old journals, camping gear--remained tucked away. my photos remained in their envelope on my desk all term. i think i actually sat down at that desk only once in all those months. melissa and i never got around to putting things up on our wall. it seemed silly, kind of, knowing that we were moving on so soon and would just have to take it all down again.

moving has its good points. for one, it forces you to carefully evaluate every thing that you pack into those boxes. as i repacked all my stuff, i made three piles: things i need now, things i will use later, and things to get rid of. being so transient has forced me to slim down what i own, in no small part because moving it all around is a pain. also because moving so much forces you to prioritize: what do i really want to own? clothes. books. a journal. photos of friends. a deck of cards. several frisbees. a bike. kitchen equipment. camera. computer. good backpacks. i don't need five sweaters: two or three will do just fine. which ones do i keep? the ones bequeathed by friends. the bright colored ones. the rest are going to goodwill.

otherwise, moving is challenging for me. dislodging myself from what i come to know and enjoy; from my routine, from my daily patterns, from those who i love... is hard. i crave roots. and at the same time, i am glad to be living the life i am so lucky to live. i also know that this is the way that life is probably going to be for a while: busy, full of changes, exciting, and... transient. my stuff will spend a lot of time in boxes. i'm not going to unpack for a while. i'm going to be stuck in the inbetween space for a bit: between boxes and roots. the best i can do is take things as they come, and enjoy each period of my life for what it is, for what it offers and what will be lost, when the boxes come out again.

b